The Gasman Song

Flanders and Swann

Michael Flanders and Donald Swann were a pair of entertainers in Britain in the fifties and sixties. Their lyrics tend to involve a lot of word play and humour. Most people know at least a few of their songs even if they don't know the source. The chorus about Mud, mud, glorious mud! Nothing quite like it for cooling the blood! is a great example. They also wrote the Gnu song... the real one, that is, not the Join us now and share the software one. (The Flanders and Swann one is better. Trust me on this.)

You can still get their albums, in a Best of.. collection, or look out for At the Drop of a Hat, At the Drop of Another Hat and The Bestiary of.., which sometimes has a extiary attached. Even better: the boxed set which contains the lot. Recommended.

For more information, see this rather excellent Flanders and Swann site.

The Gasman Cometh

Reproduced by permission of the Flanders & Swann Estates.

It was on a Monday morning that the gasman came to call,
The gastap wouldn't turn, I wasn't getting gas at all,
He tore up all the skirting boards to try and find the main,
And I had to call the carpenter to put it back again.

Oh it all makes work for the working man to do.

It was on the Tuesday morning the carpenter came round,
He hammered and he chiseled, and he said "Look what I've found!"
Your joists are full of dry rot, but I'll put them all to rights."
Then he nailed right through a cable <pop!> and out went all the lights.

Oh it all makes work for the working man to do.

It was on the Wednesday morning the electrician came,
He called me Mr Sanderson, which isn't quite the name,
He couldn't reach the fuse box without standing on the bin,
Then his foot went through a window, so I called the glazier in.

Oh it all makes work for the working man to do.

Twas on the Thursday morning the glazier came along,
With his putty, and his blowtorch, and his merry glazier song,
He put another pane in, it took no time at all,
But I had to get the painter in to come and paint the wall.

Oh it all makes work for the working man to do.

It was on the Friday morning the painter made a start,
With undercoats and overcoats, he painted every part,
Every nook and every cranny, but I found when he had gone,
He'd painted over the gastap, and I couldn't turn it on!

On Saturday, and Sunday, they do no work at all:
So it was on the Monday morning that the gasman came to call!